Long Distance

Tick tock.

11:57 pm

Imade watched the clock on the wall following the ticking of the second hand, trying to distract her mind from the waiting. She looked away and amused herself with her laptop screensaver for a while. A distorted picture of the Simpsons’ family, from her favorite cartoon.

Tick tock. Her ears continued to follow the sound of the clock. She tried to ignore it but she couldn’t help but look up again.

11:58 pm

Imade grunted, she could have sworn three minutes usually went faster than this. She was a recovering nail biter, seventeen months sober but didn’t realize when her finger ended up in her mouth and she began to gnaw at her pinky nail. It was a nervous tic, as anxious as she was for midnight to come, it was mixed with a little fear.

11:59 pm

Tick tock.

Sixty seconds left, she reached up and adjusted her already perfect braids, straightened the invisible crease on her shirt and sat up straighter. She hoped the lighting was right. She was using the sitting room because the lights were brighter there. Or was it too bright? Maybe she should have gone for something softer, maybe— the gentle ringtone of her FaceTime interrupted her thoughts. She looked at her computer, at the cute picture of her boyfriend at the zoo that had popped up to cover her screen. She took that picture herself the last time they were together in person. Her heart skipped a beat like it always did whenever she saw him, after two years some things never change. She took a deep breath and picked up the call.

“Hey babe!”

Dare gave her his signature grin, his lips barely lifting at the side. It was all in the way his eyes lit up that made you know he was smiling, “Hey you, I was worried you might have fallen asleep.”

“No, I waited up for your call.”

“Ohh thank you for staying up for me.”

“Of course,” was her only response, then silence trailed for a while.

“How’s work?” He asked.

“It’s fine,” She shrugged.

“Ohh and you? You’re… alright?”

“Yeah I’m fine.”

The silence came back, Dare adjusted his glasses uncomfortably. “Uhh I guess I should let you sleep then. I don’t want you stressed out at the office tomorrow.”

“I…” Imade wanted to argue but decided not to, “I’ll text you.”

Dare looked disappointed but he nodded and ended the call. He wasn’t the only one who was dissatisfied, Imade wrapped her hands around herself as a rush of tears fell from her eyes.

Dare stared at his phone’s blank screen for several moments, he knew something was wrong but he couldn’t put his finger on it. Their weekly calls usually lasted between 3 – 6 hours, once they were on the phone for 12 hours straight. Maybe it was because they hadn’t talked in a few weeks, he had been busy with exams and she was busy with work, it might take a moment to get back into their old groove. Maybe he was imagining things and Imade was just tired, she would tell him if it was more than that. Wouldn’t she?

“Flight 416 to Lagos, Nigeria is boarding at gate 3, I repeat flight 416…”

Dare stuck his phone in his pocket and got up. If there was something wrong, Imade would tell him to his face in a couple of hours.

Imade had a bad day, she spent half of it in traffic, her client stood her up and most irking of all, Dare hadn’t sent her a single text all day. Maybe he knew something was wrong? But if he did, wasn’t he supposed to call her like a normal boyfriend would, ask her? She checked her WhatsApp for what had to be the hundredth time today and still nothing. With a frustrated sigh Imade flung her phone to the other side of the couch and reached for the remote, she was going to drown her sorrows in endless TV.

Imade heard the doorbell ring but she didn’t budge. Awele’s room was right beside the door, she was hoping her roommate would think she wasn’t home yet and answer the door. Besides, she wasn’t expecting anyone so it had to be Awele’s guest. The bell rang for a second time, a few seconds later she heard a third ring and a fourth. Imade slapped the arm of her chair and got up angrily, she slipped on her slippers and went to get the door. She didn’t check the peephole before opening the door, that’s why she was completely shocked to see who was behind it. But soon her face relaxed from shock into warmth as she smiled at her visitor.

A cab driver pulled up and rolled down his passenger side window, “Dare?”

Dare nodded, opened the back seat door and got in. Once inside he leaned back and sighed. He was exhausted, he was running on no sleep for the past 22 hours and he could barely keep his eyes open.

“Where are we going?” The driver asked.

He thought he already put his destination on the app before booking. “Bridge Way estate, Jakande,” he said.

The driver nodded, “The map says two hours, there’s traffic.”

Dare sighed again. He wanted to head home, which was only a 30 minute drive from the airport and get some sleep. But he needed to go somewhere important first. He closed his eyes, at least he could get a little nap in before he arrived at his destination. As he was drifting away, a passing thought came to his mind that he needed to make a quick stop at the Ice Cream factory.

Imade opened the door wider so that her visitor could enter.

“I wasn’t expecting you.”

Maxwell smiled in his way, in this way that makes it seem like he knows everything you’re thinking and feeling. “I know and that’s because I wanted to surprise you. With my presence and with these.” He held up a white paper bag that had Ice cream factory written on it.

Imade squeeled, “No, you did not get me brownies.”

His smile got wider and pride gleamed in his eyes, “Yes I did.”

She laughed and gave him a tight hug, which he reciprocated with the same energy, “You don’t know how much I need these.”

“Well then how about we go sit down and you can tell me.”

She pulled back and nodded. “Let me get us a plate.”

It was dark when they arrived at the apartment complex and Dare had slept through the whole ride. The driver had to give him a light shove to wake him up.

“Sorry…” Dare mumbled. He paid the driver and got out of the car.

The complex that Imade lived in had changed a lot since the last time he was here. For starters, it was a different color, they seemed to have built a whole recreational court right in front and it was a lot busier than he remembered. It made him uncomfortable to see the changes because it reminded him how long it had been since he was last here. How long it had been since he saw Imade.

The security guards were new too but they let him in. He remembered that Imade had taught him how to bypass the security questions by pretending he lived there. At least that still worked. He made his way into the complex, the elevator was under maintenance so he had to take the stairs. He was grateful that he packed light, just a duffel bag and a bag pack for his laptop because he couldn’t imagine having to log a huge suitcase up a flight of stairs to the tenth floor where his girlfriend lived.

He got to her door and he was nervous, his palms were sweaty, he was suddenly feeling very unsure. Maybe he should have called first, just to make sure she was home. It would have ruined the surprise but Imade hated surprises anyway. No, this was different. She had been begging him to come home for months, this was definitely a surprise she would want. He hoped.

“No way! That is so great! I’m really happy for you Made.” Maxwell said, they were sitting close together on the couch.

“Thank you, I haven’t really told anyone yet.”

He put his hand on his chest, “So I’m the first to hear, I’m honored. You know we have to celebrate, toast to your success. Do you have any alcohol?”

She laughed, “We need alcohol to toast?”

“No but it makes more fun.”

She shook her head, “There’s some white wine in the fridge.”

“Great.” He jumped up and jogged into the kitchen.

Imade sighed. Maxwell is right, this is great, this is a great thing, she thought to herself. There is nothing to be sad about. She heard the doorbell ring and got up to answer it. She assumed that it was her roommate that seemed to be MIA so far today. She got to the door then looked through the peephole and her heart skipped a bit. She wasn’t sure if she was imagining things so she hurriedly unlocked the door and opened it.

“Hey babe!” Dare said with his unique smile.

Imade said nothing, frozen in shock.

“Hey Made, where are the glasses again?”

She turned to see Maxwell coming out of the kitchen to the corridor she was standing in, holding the bottle of wine. “Ohh… uh… in the uh… cupboard above the sink,”

“Made?” She heard Dare mumble behind her.

“Ohh we have a guest, I’ll get an extra glass.” Maxwell said and went back into the kitchen.

“We?” Dare mumbled.

Imade turned back to him, “I wasn’t expecting you.”

He nodded slowly, “I wanted to suprise you,”

“All the way from Canada?”

“Uh yes… am I interrupting something?”

She suddenly realized she hadn’t let him in. “Ohh uh… no, no, come in.”

Dare did as she asked and walked in going straight for the living room. He was hoping to see other people or just one other person, to assure him his girlfriend wasn’t having wine alone with some guy. To his dismay, he didn’t see anyone just the lone, now empty bag from Ice cream factory and a plate with what could only assume were brownie crumbs. She was alone having wine and her favorite dessert with some guy.

The questionable man walks out of the kitchen, this time with three wine glasses along with the wine. “Hey man, how are you doing? I’m Maxwell…”

Imade came in behind him, “Ohh sorry, I meant to introduce you. Dare, this is Maxwell… uhh Maxwell this is Dare…”

Maxwell what? The friend? The colleague? The cousin? She seemed to conveniently leave the detail as to who Maxwell is to her out.

“Wow, the boyfriend,” Maxwell laughed and shook him again. Dare let him reluctantly, he didn’t like the way he called him “the boyfriend. “Wait, I thought you were in America?”

“Canada.” Imade and Dare said at the same time.

Maxwell raised his hands in defense, “My bad, I’ll just pour the wine.”

The sound of the wine pouring into glasses was the only thing that filled the room. Dare was looking at Imade who refused to make eye contact with him, she just watched Maxwell pour the drink.

Maxwell picked up the glasses and passed it around, “I think we should toast to Imade’s success.”

“Her success?” Dare asked.

“Yeah, her new contract.”

He didn’t know about any contract, “I didn’t know about any contract,”

A silence fell between them again.

Imade sighed, “Uh Maxwell… it’s uh… late…”

Maxwell nodded like he knew this was coming and dropped his glass, “Yeah I should get out of your hair.” He looked at Dare, “It was nice to meet you.”

“Yeah… same,” Dare said but he didn’t mean it.

Maxwell turned to Imade, “I’ll text you.”

She nodded and watched him leave the room, she could hear his footsteps as he walked down the corridor and listened to the sound of him opening the door, then shutting it.

“He seems nice,” Dare said sarcastically as he dropped his glass next to Maxwell’s on the center table.

“Don’t do that…”

He looked at her, “Maybe I should just go too.”

She shook her head, “Don’t do that either.”

“Do what?”

“Pretend like nothing happened, just say what’s on your mind. For once, just tell me how you feel.”

He laughed but it lacked humor, “You want to know how I feel? I feel a lot of things. I feel betrayed, confused, uncomfortable and so… damn… tired! I’m coming from taking a 20 plus hour trip just to see you and you don’t even look happy about it. I don’t even know what I walked into and you haven’t given me an explanation yet it’s me that needs to talk? Is he the reason you’ve been acting so weird these past few days?”

“You didn’t walk into anything, Maxwell and I are just friends.”

Dare scoffed, “I thought we were being honest.”

“You want honesty, okay. You’re the reason I was acting weird, not Maxwell. We’re supposed to be dating but even after two years it still doesn’t feel like that.”

“What does that even mean?”

“You took the job! You took the job, Dare. When we started dating I knew you were in Canada and I knew long distance was going to be hard but there was a light at the end of the tunnel. After waiting two years for you to finish your masters you call me up and tell me that you took a job in Japan. How could you? I thought we were on the same page.”

“What page?”

“That we were going to end up together.”

“I am on that page with you!”

“No, you’re not.”

“Imade, I love you. Of course, I wanted to come home to you, I still do. This job doesn’t change that.”

“This job changes everything.”

“But I told you about it before I took it, you said it was my choice. Why didn’t you just tell me how you felt?”

“Because it is… it was your choice. And I wanted you to choose me.”

“It wasn’t about you.”

“How can you say that?”

“Imade I studied Art History, I was never going to find a job here at home. You knew that, we joked about it all the time. So I don’t understand where all this is coming from.”

“Why didn’t you ask me to come with you?”

“Would you have?”

“If you asked me… but you never even considered that did you?”

“Imade you’ve always told me that you never planned to move. You said your life was here, your work was here, you wanted to raise kids here. How can I do that to you, upend your life for my benefit?”

“It would have been my choice but you never gave it to me.”

“I didn’t want to hold you back.”

“But you already did! Making me wait two years for you, thinking we had a future, that held me back.”

“Imade, this job doesn’t end our relationship.”

“With school there was an end, I knew when you graduated that we would get to be together. But what am I supposed to wait for now? I can’t keep waiting, Dare. I won’t.”

“Okay… okay… you can still come with me, I’m sorry I didn’t ask before but I’m asking now.”

She shook her head sadly, “I used to be so desperate for a future with you but I’m not anymore. They’re renewing my contract at work, I’m getting a house, a car and some other perks. I just signed on to stay with them for the next five years. I’m not going anywhere.”

He looked exhausted, he dropped on the couch his hands on his head, “Imade, what are you saying?”

“Dare, I’m saying that I’m no longer closing my heart off to finding love somewhere else, from someone else.”

He looked at her, “From Maxwell?”

“From anyone.”

He shook his head, and suddenly he looked angry. “Why didn’t you just say something? Why didn’t you tell me how you felt? Instead of letting me think everything was fine. What am I supposed to do now?”

“I can’t tell you everything…”

“Ohh please… if you can spend one hour dissecting the personalities of your coworkers, you can take a minute to tell your worries about our relationship. You claim to be so great at communicating but when it came to the most important thing, you said nothing. You want to know something? I took that job in Japan to impress you. You’re always making all these incredible moves in your career and I wanted you to be proud of mine. Somehow, I thought that it would bring us closer, not tear us apart.”

He picked up his duffel and headed for the door. Imade wanted to call his name, to stop him but her tongue was stuck to the roof of her mouth. So she listened to the footsteps as they faded away with her relationship and with the sound of the door shut, ending it for good.

All images are sourced form pexels