21 People Share What Killed Their Strong Feelings For Someone
Why do we love someone? It’s crazy. We see a person we’ve never really had a close interaction with before, and just fall in love or have this huge crush on him/her. Afterwards, it’s kind of like a two-way street. We either get to love (or just like) them more after getting to know them better, or we don’t. That is if the crush/love/like doesn’t change to hate/irritation/resentment.
In light of this, this week’s episode on Afrogist is the question: What killed your feelings for someone you were once madly in love with? Here are the responses we got!
“He didn’t like fat girls and was too obsessed with my slim stature… like bro! What if I get fat? What if I want to get fat!?”
Still slim though (F)
“I found out she was older than I was 🥲 by a lot.”
Jan(M)
Benin City
“We went on the best date ever and he ghosted me for months after. The saddest part is, this wasn’t the first time he led me on.
I waited weeks for just a text and my friend had to talk some sense into me before I deleted his number.”
Spandex (F)
Lagos, Nigeria
“The moment she became domineering and manipulative…”
Eddy (M)
London, UK
“When he told me he wouldn’t be settling down anytime soon, probably in 5 years, emphasis on the probability word, deep down I knew this baba wan use me learn work. I had to drop my feelings for him, it wasn’t worth it.”
Martha (F)
“She wasn’t communicating, caring or showing any affection. I was the only one doing everything.”
Captain Jack (M)
Nigeria
“She rarely replies to text messages, and she wouldn’t control her words whenever she’s angered; hereby causing me psychological & emotional pains.
At first, I was like, is this the true colour of love? Not until it dawned on me that if we continue this relationship, our marriage will surely hit the rocks because our ideologies are not in sync.”
Professor (M)
Nigeria
“I found out that he was having an affair with a woman that I took as my big sis. I seek advice from her, and I cook for her, in fact, we eat together from the same plate. Most times when my ex and I fight, she pleads on his behalf and helps us settle the matter. I never knew my ex was having a very serious affair with her. You might be wondering how I got to know, it was his neighbour that told me that whenever I go back to school, that stuff usually happens, and that I should try to come see him unannounced.
I did o, as God would have it, I got to his house at 11:30 pm that fateful day, and lo and behold, I met this my area sister tying my own towel o, with so-called bf, ex now anyways.”
Saymama (F)
Nigeria
“The abuse and manipulation.”
Brenda (F)
Delta
“Stood by the door and listened to him have seggzzz with his ‘friend’ that had been visiting for over a month. Men lmaooo!”
Maiden (F)
Lagos, Nigeria
“He couldn’t handle me treating him the exact same way he treated me. He was allowed, and me? nay I wasn’t + he ghosted me a lot of times.”
Zo (F)
Nigeria
“I would say his inability to care about the little things because the little things matter. And a lot of people need to know that because people take those little things for granted.”
Chiochio (F)
Lagos, Nigeria
“He told me I was wife material simply because I acted in a particular way that was untypical. I knew at that moment that he was profiling me and setting me up to meet a particular stereotype. He had placed me on a perfection pedestal, and if I fell short by chance or deliberately, I’d see pepper. He was not in love with me, but with the idea of who I appeared to be. Omo, I had to call it quits.”
Threse (F)
Lagos
“Every time we would go out on a date, he would always be pressing his phone like there was something important there that was more important than me. That was a big turn-off for me. I started to hate him after that. I like my man’s attention so much, it is a priority for me. if I can’t get it, I would rather not have him… that was a deal breaker for me. I just couldn’t.”
Zeppa (F)
Lagos State
“Well, I won’t say ‘madly’ but I really liked someone, one time. She legit liked me too, but then she confessed she also liked 3-5 other guys in the same way! 😂
Like, GUY! How can you make 5 guys feel special in the same way and match their energy? That capacity is scary. I immediately removed myself from her list.”
V (M)
Ibadan, Nigeria
“She had a bad attitude and didn’t want to change.”
Rex (M)
Nigeria
“He was not good in bed at all, his dick doesn’t rise, had bad hygiene, bad breath.”
Sun (F)
Nigeria
“We had started dating and on my birthday, he uploaded my pic with the caption ‘Happy birthday bestie’… Called it off some weeks after.”
CJ (F)
Lagos State
“When he started being deliberately mean to me. I had to run.”
Grace (F)
Lagos
“I kept on asking him to come over, cause he said he really liked me then, but he kept on posting me. Started acting like I was the one begging him, I was doing most of the calls too. The minute I decided, it was enough, and stopped calling him or asking for his presence all the time, he started calling me every day, acting so in love.
No one had to tell me, I just knew, he was in love with the idea of himself being loved, he was never in love with me, just the love and attention and care I had to give. Left without looking back. The human being still calls me from time to time with stupid talk of, what could have been… I’ve not blocked him so he can keep behaving like that. Can’t believe there was a time I was crazy over that kind of person. Sorry, it’s long. He was my first love.”
Lisa (F)
Lagos
“He had a small D. It never would have worked out so there was no need trying.”
Jane (F)
TG
Love is a beautiful thing, well, when you get to experience it with the right person. Otherwise, it’s just hurtful and lesson-filled. The same goes for friendships, relationships, dating, and depending on who you are, you know, how strong you are emotionally, it’s all fun and games either way.
Here’s to hoping we all find and enjoy genuine love, care and warmth in each of our own circles in life. Happy New Month!
Curious and want to contribute to the next Afrogist episode? Here!
Stories collected are shared only with the writer’s permission.
Names may or may not be real to ensure anonymity.
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